The Age That I Wish To Go Back To

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14 Kundalini Suspension Lights

I've been tagged by Mariuca with writing about the age that, if I could, would like to go back to. My post can't match the poignancy or quality of the one Lady Java made in response to the same tag. So I'll try to be as brief as I can be.

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Really, this might seem like a cop out, but there is no age that I would want to go back to. Everything that I have experienced at every age has made me who I am today, and I like who I am today and the things that I have done in life and the experiences that I've had and the people I've met and the places I've been to. If I went back to an earlier age, there is no guarantee I would make the same choices, thus I would be a different person that I am now--with positive or negative consequences, or both.

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But if I had to pick a age to go back to, it would be the age of 14. With one caveat: I'd like to go back to that age with all my memories and thoughts and knowledge that I have acquired up until now in tact. THEN, and only then, as a fourteen year-old and a freshman in high school, I could go through some of the most important years of my life with the wisdom I myself had acquired. Then, there would be choices I would have made differently. I would have been kinder to other people. I would have made better choices about exercise and the money I spent and the food I ate. I would have handled some family issues differently as well. But all of those new decisions would have been with the wisdom I would have acquired myself, and acting out of my own twenty-twenty hindsight. Then I'd have the chance to rectify some mistakes, and not to make others--some of which I still regret.

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14 Traffic Lights


Thanks for reading.

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5 comments:

LadyJava said...

Hi Matt..

Wouldn't it be lovely if we can go back in time with all the knowledge that we acquired now.. but again would we be really happy then, knowing not only the good stuff but also the bad stuff that will happen? You're gonna be one very busy 14 years old changing the world ;)

I smile as you mention my name and am glad that you appreciate the post as much as it was written with poignant memories and tears.

Thank you.. thank you :)
LadyJava

May 13, 2008 1:32 PM
Arduous Nincompoop said...

Matt,
You echoed my thoughts as well. I would not want to go back a single year either. I am enjoying life now more so than ever. I am 45. When I was younger it seems I always stressed about what kind of person I would grow up to be.

I worried that I didn't measure up. That friends of mine were smarter, prettier, richer....blah blah blah.

I never knew that the one thing I was rich with would see me through any obsticle in life. My family. I am blessed to have a family that truly knows unconditional love.

If I had to choose a time to go back to it would be 17. I would take better care of my Dodge Charge and keep it for a fun hot rod!

Great post!

May 13, 2008 10:18 PM
Henson Ray said...

It's tough to look back on the past...everyone has things they'd like to change or do differently...but the fact is, whatever you did made you who you are today...and the fact that you're able to see you made mistakes shows that you have grown and matured...I would never want to go back to 14...and grow up again...it was hard enough the first time...Now maybe if I could go back to 22 with all the knowledge and widsom (?) I have today...that might be fun...

May 15, 2008 7:44 AM
Matthew S. Urdan said...

Hey Henson, thanks for the comments. You know, the main reason I wanted to go back to 14, with all I know now of course, is to kick ass in competitive debate. I didn't really figure out how to be an elite debater until near the end of my senior year. We finished 3rd in Michigan my senior year, and I was pretty confident with one more year under my belt we could have been state champs. Knowing what I know now, back in my freshman body, we could have dominated for four years and that would have opened up greater scholarship opportunities and I probably would have had a better perpective. I was committed to premed from the start, but with a more successful debate career, I think I would have considered law or poli sci more seriously--which I think would have been a better fit for me in hindsight.

Of course, those are just wishes and fantasies. Like I said in my initial paragraph, I am who I am because of what I did and the choices I made, and I don't regret those choices.

Ladyjava, you are most welcome.

Arduous, thanks for the comments...I bet you have stories to tell about your Charger!

May 15, 2008 9:03 AM
Mariuca said...

Hi Matt, thanks for playing along. I see u have chosen the tender age of 14 as well, those were some good old days indeed! It's Friday here, so happy weekend to you. :)

May 16, 2008 12:41 AM

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